Our Philosophy on Love

about-image02Why are you successful in your professional life? What efforts did you make to get where you are today? Did you go to school and earn a degree or certifications? Did you pursue continuing education on new technologies in your industry? Did you attend conferences to stay up-to-date in your industry and share ideas with like-minded people? That might be why you have achieved the level of success you have in your professional life. You’ve put in a lot of time, effort, and practice into making that happen. Now, how about your dating life?

Is Love supposed to magically happen?  
Falling in love can happen like a fairy tale but, it’s just not typical, and keeping love alive is even less likely if you don’t have the education or skill-set to create a successful relationship.  Like finding that dream job, it takes practice, time, effort, and the relationship is not always perfect or the way you’ve imagined it.

How We Typically Learn About Relationships
Most of us learn about relationships is through our parents, many of them dysfunctional in their own ways, and through the media.  And, let’s face it,  strong, loving, caring, amazing relationships are not found on TV because it doesn’t make for good ratings.  Instead, they air things we will watch like drama, jealousy,  back stabbing,  and conflict.  They show us the “train wreck of relationships” and, if these are the only ways we learn about relationships,  we’re screwed!

Where do you really want to put your time and effort going forward?
If you are ready for the right relationship, it’s time to devote as much effort into finding and creating an amazing relationship as you have your job.  After all, when you die, your tombstone surely won’t say,  “He/She was an amazing employee! ”  Instead , it is more likely to read,  ” Amazing father, husband, mother, wife, brother,  sister, friend.”

Getting Ready…

Step One:  Fall in love with yourself and your life.  If you don’t love yourself and your life, how can you expect someone else to?  We can help you do that!

Step Two:  Know where you are taking yourself in life.  After all,  if you don’t know where you are going,  how do you know if someone else is going your way?  Instead, we end up hitching our train to someone else’s train and end up on a detour we never really wanted for ourselves.  So, what’s your destination in life?

Step Three:  Know that you are beautifully flawed.  We are, after all, human beings so, when choosing a partner, you need to be clear about the imperfections you bring to the table and be fully accepting of the ones your partner brings.  You need to love, and be loved for exactly who you/they are and not try to change anyone or be changed by someone else.  Change happens from the inside out, not the outside in.

Step Four:  Be conscious of the dating and relationship choices you are making.   Building a strong foundation for an amazing relationship starts from the very beginning in being extremely open and honest with your needs and expectations.  It starts with you being very clear about what those are for yourself, and then articulating them to your date/partner as they arise.  It’s also about finding out your partner’s needs and expectations and finding loving ways that best meet both of your needs.

Step Five:  Know your triggers and dump your baggage.  We all have triggers.  Notice yours and own them.  Notice your partners triggers and lovingly ask them, “Huh, I wonder what that’s all about for you?”  It’s an opportunity for both of you to grow while feeling safe and supported and continuing to dump some of the baggage that we all bring to our relationships.

Step Six:  Grow.  Finding a partner takes getting out there and learning from your experiences.  What worked well?  What didn’t work well?  What could be done better?  Once you do find someone who seems to fit, the two of you will grow and process at different speeds and rates so, just like you’d want them to be patient with you while you work things out on your end, you’ve got to be willing to do the same for them.

Step Seven:  Be open.  Your partner may not appear in the package you’d like or had envisioned.  If you really, truly click with someone, why not give it a chance and see where it might go?  After all, when our looks and stamina begin to fade, it’s all about the relationship and the safe, deep, loving, supportive conversations you share with each other that allow you both to grow individually and together as a couple.

Step Eight:  Take action now!  If what you’ve read here makes sense to you, it’s time you start investing in your love life. You can have an amazing, successful relationship!   It’s not too late, and you’ve come to the right place….Where love is ready and waiting!